


Buy the Stars

by feentanz



Series: One Shots [29]
Category: Nikolai Series - Leigh Bardugo, The Grisha Trilogy - Leigh Bardugo
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/M, Jealousy, Roommates, i dont really know what this is
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-12
Updated: 2020-01-12
Packaged: 2021-02-27 13:01:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,505
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22227568
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/feentanz/pseuds/feentanz
Summary: Zoya slapped his arm, rolling her eyes in response. “Shut up,” she muttered, leaning back against the edge of the sofa, her eyes trained on him. “I thought you only said it because you disliked him.” Nikolai snorted. “Dislike is a weak term,” he responded. Zoya furrowed her brows. “You’ve met him twice, why do you hate him so much?” Because I’m jealous. Nikolai pushed the words away to the back of his head.
Relationships: Nikolai Lantsov/Zoya Nazyalensky
Series: One Shots [29]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/594364
Comments: 1
Kudos: 34





	Buy the Stars

**Author's Note:**

> Based on the song _buy the stars_ by marina!

Nikolai heard the front door slam shut, then steps in the hallway. Zoya’s boots clicked on the floor, then something hit the ground. Silence. The door to her room slammed shut. He sighed, closing the laptop he had been working on and getting up from the sofa. It was ten in the morning, and if anyone could get Zoya in  _ this  _ mood this early, it was her boyfriend. Or, ex-boyfriend. It was hard to keep up these days. 

“Zo?” Nikolai asked into the silence, softly knocking on her door. “Everything okay?” 

The door opened and Zoya appeared in the doorframe, storming past him with a furious expression. “Everything is just perfect,” she yelled over her shoulder, and he could hear the door to their balcony being opened. 

Nikolai sighed again, following his roommate. Zoya was fiddling with a lighter as he stepped onto the small balcony to join her, watching her deeply inhale the smoke from her cigarette. “What happened?” he wanted to know, watching the anger on her face slowly dissolving into something else. Sadness, perhaps. 

Zoya crossed her arms defensively, snipping some ash away with her finger. “Nothing,” she muttered, but she had her face turned away. 

After living together for a year, Nikolai knew her well enough to see right through that lie. “What did he do?” he asked instead. It was quite obvious who he meant.  _ He  _ was Mal Oretsev, a guy Zoya had met at college, and probably the person Nikolai loathed most in the world. Officially, he had still been with his ex-girlfriend when he had first taken Zoya home, and since then the entire situation had been more messy than anything. Personally, Nikolai didn’t quite understand what Zoya saw in him anyway, but he suspected it was less her personal attachment to the guy and more her own need to prove that she could have him instead of some other girl. 

Zoya played with the cigarette in her hands, staring at the smoke which was dissolving in the air. “We broke up, I guess,” she said eventually. When she saw Nikolai’s expression, she added “This time for real.” 

He raised a brow. “How so?” This was hardly the time to show that he had somehow been hoping for weeks that it might eventually happen. That Zoya would finally stop chasing someone who was not even worth it. 

“He doesn’t want to tell Alina that it’s over, but he also doesn’t want to end things with us.” Zoya huffed. “But I’m tired of being the other girl, so I broke it off.” She fluffed some hair over her shoulder, blowing smoke into Nikolai’s face. “Stop looking at me like you don’t believe me!” 

Nikolai sighed. “I’ve told you a thousand times that he’s not worth it,” he remarked. “Why have you suddenly chosen to believe me, Nazyalensky?” 

Zoya gave him a vaguely annoyed look, putting her cigarette out on the balcony railing. “I decided I want my freedom back,” she replied, pushing past him to slip back into the living room. “I grew tired of being his plaything.” 

Now that sounded more like the Zoya he usually knew. Nikolai smiled lightly, following her inside. “Took you long enough,” he commented. 

Zoya shot him a warning glance, sinking down on the couch and crossing her legs. She was picking on a loose thread of her jeans. “Guess you were right after all,” she muttered. “When you told me it was a stupid idea.” 

Nikolai sat down next to her. Over the last few weeks, he had spent countless hours listening to Zoya complain about Oretsev, then about the story how they had made up, then about the next break up. All the time he has been wondering whether Zoya even realized that half the guys in the city were only waiting for a chance to date her and that she could do a lot better without even having to try. She probably did realize, though, judging from her level of self-confidence. In some moments, he had even allowed himself to wonder whether she might realize how Nikolai himself felt.   
  
“I usually am right,” he replied, flashing a grin. “I thought you had gotten used to it.”   
  
Zoya slapped his arm, rolling her eyes in response. “Shut up,” she muttered, leaning back against the edge of the sofa, her eyes trained on him. “I thought you only said it because you disliked him.” 

Nikolai snorted. “Dislike is a weak term,” he responded. 

Zoya furrowed her brows. “You’ve met him twice, why do you hate him so much?” 

_ Because I’m jealous.  _ Nikolai pushed the words away to the back of his head. “He’s cheating and lying, what’s there to like?” he said instead. 

Zoya played with a strand of hair, not meeting his eyes. A moment of silence followed. Eventually, her gaze returned to his. “Stop looking at me like this.”    
Nikolai stiffened. “Like what?”   
  
“Like my heart is broken.” Zoya fluffed some hair over her shoulder, straightening her back. “Don’t you know what Tamar always says? I have no heart.” She smirked a little. 

Very obviously, that was not true. She just liked to pretend that she didn’t. “So what are you going to do now?” Nikolai wanted to know, just when Zoya’s phone began to ring. 

She rolled her eyes, flashing him an apologetic smile and taking the call. “What do you want?” she asked into the phone, and it was quite obvious who was on the other end. 

Nikolai shook his head, getting up from the couch and leaving her behind. He didn’t like to admit how it hurt to see her answer another call, another try to lure her back in. Which was why right now, he couldn’t stand to be in the same room as her. 

In the evening, Nikolai was in the kitchen cooking pasta, just when Zoya entered again. He hadn’t seen her since earlier, and he refused to turn when she walked in. Instead, he acted like he was busy cooking. Perhaps it was petty. 

Zoya leaned against the counter next to him, arms crossed. “I told him it’s over. Again.” She paused, giving Nikolai an expectant look. “I’m done.” 

He didn’t turn, instead, he only nodded. “Good for you.” However, Zoya was very conveniently blocking the counter, and he needed salt. Hesitantly, he tore his gaze away from the pasta water. “You’re in my way.”    
She didn’t move, only looked up at him with a frown. “What’s wrong?” she wanted to know, studying his tense expression. “I didn’t do anything wrong.” 

No, she hadn’t. It was he who was doing things wrong. “Zoya,” he muttered, already half annoyed. “I need salt.”

Again, Zoya didn’t quite care to move. He was standing right in front of her now, her eyes still trained on his. “Since when are we keeping secrets?” she wanted to know, tone slightly accusing now. 

Nikolai had fallen silent. He was staring into her eyes, as wide and blue as the ocean. Usually, in moments like these he reminded himself that she had a boyfriend - or something close to that - and wasn’t interested, but now… Zoya being single was something he would have needed more time to prepare for. He could feel her breathing brushing over his throat when she watched him silently, waiting for an answer. 

And then, although he knew better, Nikolai leaned down to kiss her. 

He didn’t quite know why he had decided to make that decision, today of all days, but as soon as his lips pressed against Zoya’s, he forgot. His fingers were tracing the line of her jaw, her neck, running through her soft hair. And she wasn’t pulling away. Instead, her lips opened under his, her hands wrapping around his neck. For a moment, time seemed to stop. He could feel her everywhere, body pressed against this, the warmth of her skin under his fingertips. 

Just until something hissed beside them, making Nikolai jump at the sound. The pasta water was boiling over apparently. He blinked a few times, trying to comprehend what had just happened, while Zoya slipped away and turned the oven off. 

For once, Nikolai was out of words. Usually, he was good at knowing what to say when, how to solve problems. But right now there was nothing to be done. 

Zoya was hovering in front of the oven, apparently equally confused. “Sorry about your dinner,” she said eventually. 

Nikolai released a nervous breath, running a hand through his hair.  _ How could he have been so stupid?  _ “I’m sorry,” he replied instead. “I shouldn’t have-” 

Zoya interrupted. “I can’t do this right now, Nikolai.” She took a deep breath, brushing some hair away from her face. “I need some time to think. To be… alone.” She shook her head, then turned on her heel and left. Her gaze was almost apologetic. 

Nikolai sunk back against the counter, closing his eyes for a moment. Perhaps someday, he would master the art of truly understanding Zoya Nazyalensky. But apparently not today. 


End file.
